WHY DID THE HOMELESS HORSE HAVE A SEVERE MENTAL DISORDER?
Because it had become unstable.
WHAT DID THE PONY SAY TO THE STALLION?
I look up to you… Don’t ever disappoint me.
WHY COULDN’T THE HORSE RUN COUNTER-CLOCKWISE AROUND THE RACE TRACK?
Because horses can’t tell time.
HOW MANY HORSES DOES IT TAKE TO SCREW IN A LIGHT BULB?
One horse and one cowboy. The cowboy sits on the horse to reach the light bulb and screw it in. The horse, having no phalanges, is incapable of doing this, and the cowboy would most likely be unable to reach most light bulbs without the aid of a horse.
WHY WASN’T THE HORSE ALLOWED IN THE COUNTRY CLUB?
Because it was a race horse.
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, “Why the long face?” The horse replies, “Why the male-pattern baldness and severe eczema?” To which the bartender says, “It’s genetic, my maternal grandfather was bald and both my parents suffered with skin disease.” The horse says, “Mine is genetic as well, but my face is average, nay attractive for my species.” The horse wins.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A MARE WITH A VICTIM OF THE GALLOWS?
A prisoner who’s hung like a horse.
WHERE DID THE HORSE RECEIVE HIS BACHELOR’S DEGREE?
The University of Horses
KNOCK, KNOCK.
Who’s there?
MR. ED.
Mr. Ed who?
MR. ED GEIN, YOU BETTER RUN!
This isn’t really a horse joke.
IT SORT OF IS, THOUGH. MR. ED WAS A HORSE.
I still think it’s a bit of a stretch.
MAYBE SO, BUT DID YOU SEE THE LAST JOKE? UNIVERSITY OF HORSES? WTF?
Yeah, but at least that had horses in the punch line.
WELL, WHAT DO I KNOW ABOUT HORSES, I’M JUST AN INFAMOUS SERIAL KILLER.
Oh, right. I better run.
TOO LATE, CHUM. YOU’RE ALREADY DEAD. NOW WHO HAS THE LAST LAUGH? HA HA HA HA HA! I’M ED GEIN, AND I APPROVE THIS KNOCK KNOCK JOKE.
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